I'm frustrated right now...

[CardioClay]

And there's a reason. Yesterday I went to Dorney Park in Allentown, PA and one of my friends wanted to go on every single ride. Just so you know, it was in the 90s. My other three friends know alot of thing about HCM and my limits. When my one friend (ride-a-holic) wanted to go on rollercoasters (I don't go on rollercoasters...I'm worried I might have a heart attack), so she did, and me and the others sat and waited. About an hour later, my heart was pounding and I tried telling her. She ignored it. Then one of my other friends started hyperventilating (she has asthma) and my two guy friends started to get worried. So while the ride-a-holic went to a line, all of us went to the First Aid place. I needed A.C. and water badly and my friend who hyperventilated, needed oxygen. I felt like I was going to die outside. Then after we were better, the ride-a-holic decided to care.

I was so mad at her. Then today she said it was in the 80s yesterday, which it WASN'T. I tried telling her it was in the 90s...then she called me weak for trying to reason. I was basically dieing out there! UGH!

[Reenie]

Hi Jamie. I'm glad you were with other friends who took you seriously and went with you to the first aid station. Please show Miss Ride-A-Holic this site and your thread. I hope she can understand that you weren't just faking it and weak, that you really have a reason not to stand in the hot sun all day. I'm glad you're all right!

Reenie

[bodyshop]

That was totally selfish and uncaring of her I would definetly reconsider her friendship but some times it is hard for them to understand something they dont see I guess i have been very lucky the only ones that dont understand that I cant keep up with them are my little grandkids of course I really dont go out with that many people Yes yawn my life is now pretty boring hey but safe

[Reenie]

Welcome, bodyshop.

Reenie

[JohnM2]

Hello Jamie,

I think you need to distuingish between "Friends" and "Aquaintances". Not everyone we know and hang around with is a friend - but everyone we know is an aquaintance. Friends are people who know us well and care for us, and will stand by us in times of difficulty or trouble (and whom we in turn will support and stand by when they need our help).

It sounds to me like your "ride-a-holic" companion is an aquaintance, not a friend.

Just remember that your other companions stood by you (and the other person who was hyperventilating) and took you to the first aid tent. Where some of your symptoms due to HCM, or simply overheating.

One other comment I have for you is that some people simply can't comprehend that not everyone likes the same things they like, or has the same opinions they hold or understands things the same way other people understand them. (Religious fundamentalists - of any religion - are extreme examples of this.)

It does seem that you "ride-aholic" was very selfish with the entire group, instisting that you all hang around waiting for her to have her fun. My wife is far from weak, but she doesn't like roller-coasters, either.

I hope these comments help you

Cheers

John

[Sarah]

I'm sorry your friend is so selfish. Unfortunately, this is not the last time you will run into people who are like this and don't understand what you need.

Only YOU can take care of yourself and it is essential for HCMers to stay hydrated at all times. Take bottles of water with you everywhere this summer (they make nice carriers now so you can wear them over your shoulder and not have to carry them in your hand.) and rest when you need to rest. Don't let your friends talk you into doing more than you can.

My mom has HCM, too, and she still doesn't understand that I can't walk as far as she does (she is in rhythm and i'm in atrial fibrillation) and that I get tired sooner --she has been in afib off and on her WHOLE life and whenever I say I need to take a cab or rest or get more water, i get an argument!!! Can you believe it? My MOM! Truly.

[Glen Beamish]

It really doesn't matter if it's 90, 80 or 50 outside, if you not feeling good because of your HCM for whatever reason she needs to be more sympathetic.
Obviously she needs a little more education about your condition.
The problem being most times you probably look and function fine and some people cannot believe you have an ailment that can be de-abilitating.
Have her sit with you when your on this site and show her that HCM covers right from feeling not to bad to needing a heart transplant, that may wake her up.

[CardioClay]

Thanks for all of the support, guys. I really needed it. I went to another amusement park today, Hershey Park. I didn't go on many rides...two actually (a monorail and bumpercars...). Ride-a-holic didn't go today, she couldn't (he he heh...um...). She kinda is a friend, really kinda (even though we never hang outside of school. I really have to get her on here.). We went into every single store. LOTS OF A.C.!!! WOO! I was with the people who cared. YAY!

[Lisa Salberg]

I have been there..many times... Sometimes friends get it and sometimes they just dont...that is when you need to really question who is REALLY a "FRIEND".

Hang in there!
Lisa

[musicmaniac!]

Cardioclay,
sorry I haven't replied. Ive been so busy and haven't gotten on in a while. I just read your message and I am sorry that your "friend" treats you like that. You've got to teach that girl some manners. You should tie her up and make her be nice(just kidding). If she is really your friend she would listen to you. And if she doesn't..... make her.

musicmaniac

[kayla71]

Hey,

I'm glad you didn't go on the ride cause you never know what could happen. I dont ride rollercoasters either but I'm just a big chicken. Some people just dont know what the limits are for the people with HCM, because they've never experienced having HCM. I hope your friend will understand more the next time.

Take Care

[CardioClay]

Hello! I am not Jamie- I am her friend, Chrissy. I am the asthmatic friend. I asked to see what my friend wrote on this site (she talks about it sometimes). I'm just really happy other people out there agree with us on this issue.

Just so that you know, we went to the First Aid tent and were sent to the back. The people there were very nice, giving us both oxygen and a heart rate monitor that we had asked for.

The "friend" (note the quote) is no longer our friend anymore. She is merely someone that we e-mail from time to time. An acquaintance. We wanted to end our year on good terms with her, since she was going to a different high school. We ended well, and that's the end. No more calling my best friend 'weak.' On the contrary, I think that Jamie is the strongest person I have ever met or ever will meet.

I would just like to say thank you for supporting my friend. I try to, but I don't know how exactly she feels. I try my hardest too, and so do our other friends. I am very glad she has this website to turn to when we can't help, though.

-Chrissy

[LindaG]

I think sometimes people just don't understand that others are ill, especially if they look "OK." Your friend needs education on this disease. If she's not willing to be educated, well that's definitely an act of selfishness.
I'm glad you have the common sense to do the right thing. Personally, I think you might try something a little calmer with which to amuse yourself.
Always listen to your inner voice, and if it doesn't feel right...don't do it.
Good luck.
Linda G

[tommysgirl]

Chrissy,

Thank you for being a true friend to Jamie. She needs people like you to help look out for her and to understand her limitations. She is far from being weak and people don't always understand this. Hcm is a disease that affects the inside yet, you look so well on the outside. I have to remind people of this often when it comes to my husband. He looks like a big strong guy that could tear a car door off, why does he need help loading potting soil?, a guy said one day. Because he has a heart disease, I replied. The guy felt foolish. That one reaction will make him think twice before making a judgement the next time.

We can only support our family and friends and remind them of how wonderful and strong they are for living their lives with chronic diseases. May God bless you for your compassion and kindness. Stop by to see us anytime. This message board is for you as well.

Take care!
Sherry

[Reenie]

Chrissy, you're showing a lot of maturity for your age. I'm glad you're there for Jamie and you have other real friends. I'm glad you came to see what we're all about.

Reenie

[LindaG]

Chrissy
More people should have friends like you. You are great and just "what the doctor ordered." You showed great judgement and compassion to your "friend" by ending the year on a good note.
Take care of yourself and enjoy your summer.
Linda G

[Pam Alexson]

I am jealous Chrissy.. YOU ARE A GREAT FRIEND. I count lots of friends here but none of my outside friends come here or family either.


As hallmark cards say in their advertisements and I will borrow their slogan, " YOU ARE A KEEPER!"

Nice to know you and welcome .

Pam

[CardioClay]

Hey, Jamie here. Just to let you know, Chrissy is one of the best people that has ever been my friends. She's a very caring person and shee stands up for me and my other friends. Anyway, I haven't said anything in a while and after I put up this thread, lots of things about rollercosters and HCM started to be mentioned on the forum.

[CardioClay]

Jamie here, again...I forgot to say a few months ago that I tried ro show ride-a-holic this website. She didn''t understand it, but whatever.